How many time’s have you replayed a conversation or rehearsed what you were going to say and then things went totally different? It’s time to stop overthinking, it isn’t helping you.
It is one thing to rehearse a speech to an audience so you have your material down pat, it is another to do it for someone you are having a discussion with. I’m not saying don’t know what you are going to say, just stop stressing yourself out in advance. Often the conversation goes a totally different direction because the other person isn’t aware of your planned script. When that happens, don’t get frustrated. It might not be the right time for the conversation.
The same goes for replaying a conversation that didn’t go well over and over again in your head. You can’t change it, it is in the past. The only thing you can do is learn from it and then let it go. Next time you can try a different approach.
There is a part of our nature that wants to be sure before proceeding. This is good because you double check your work, or plans before jumping in. It is when we keep going over and over without moving forward that there is an issue. When we do this we open the door to our fears. The ones that say what we are trying to do isn’t good enough. When you do this you are basically saying that you yourself are not good enough. Negative self talk is not productive, nor is it going to help you move forward. You have to stop overthinking and allow yourself to move to the next step.
People tend to overthink when they are mad, hurt and unsure of themselves. All this will accomplish is that you will heighten the emotions you are already feeling.
If you are struggling to find an answer, or not sure how to move forward, stop thinking and do something else, When you have the courage and wisdom to let it go, you will find you are calmer. When this happens your mind is open to alternative solutions. The answers that perhaps have been evading you are more accessible and present themselves.
There are many ways to replay conversations, rehearse discussions, and go over and over your work or plans. You have to ask yourself if replaying it is giving you a positive or negative mindset. If it is a negative one, it’s time to stop overthinking because it isn’t helping you, it is hurting you.