No matter how old we get, we can all miss those days at home. For some, it comes from a time when we felt safe, loved and accepted. For others, it may be the home they didn’t have yet longed for.
For those growing up in a house full of love, there is always a sadness after moving, a sense of loss. The people are still in our lives but usually not in the same daily capacity. We are on our own and learning to make our own way in the world. If we are lucky, we build the same place of safety and love for our own families.
There is something about the carefree days, when you didn’t have to worry about paying bills, cooking meals and cleaning house. The laughter of our childhood, brings a smile for most people and happy memories. For others those memories are not as nice, fraught with pain and abuse.
Whether times or good or bad, usually (not always) one can return for a visit home … until the house is sold. I remember the sense of sadness when my childhood home was sold. It took a little while but I eventually came to the belief that home is really where your heart is, and it doesn’t matter what buildings we live in, as long as we have each other life is good. The old childhood family place can make new memories for a new family, hopefully all good.
I know though from experience, that it can also be a true sense of loss for those who are struggling to get by and make their way in the world, for them it is much harder. The sale of a childhood home means the loss of a safe haven in many ways. They too miss the happy times but sometimes have difficulty remembering them because their life is a struggle. They are forced out of the nest for whatever reason (and the reasons vary) and must walk their own path
At some point in our life, we will all need to move out of our home, whether by choice or not. Natural disaster, fire, aging, entering adulthood, job relocation, whatever the reason, a move must occur and the home of our past becomes a memory that we carry.
No matter the circumstance, at some point in our life we all miss home.
One thought on “We All Miss Home”
Leaving home at fourteen and with ten years of merchant navy service, a sense of home disappeared. Parents and family had not been a major influence for some time. In fact, relationship with anyone shore based transitory. It was marriage five years later which marked a home identity. Lived in several parts of the UK, after sea life, in course of work and marriage. Frequently, have dreamed of being back in other countries. Peculiar sleep dream situations. where still in naval uniform, in a civilian role, in later life. Also, in dream time, studying for future professional certificates. Believe, that we have predestined occupations/ professions to follow and these are pre- determined. We are meant to follow this trajectory. To escape and pursue an independent life is possible, but not easy. Those with secure home lives, have support from a background of care and understanding and have that confidence that life will offer opportunity and choice of occupation and supported by family- provided its legal!
Also, trauma can hit a previously functioning family and believe this can disturb the next generation. That there can be genetic psychological damage passed on. In that way, there can be a struggle for subsequent generations to repair damage. Mal-nourishment is known to lead, unsurprisingly, to stunted off spring. The benefit, of a secure, loved and good functioning family can be taken for granted by those who are blessed, in this way. Home is truly where the heart is, ultimately.